Mary King


Voice Dialogue is a brilliant tool for clearing what is holding you back.

Carl Jung observed that we are made of different sub personalities, or energy patterns - different 'Selves', or voices. We develop these Selves in early childhood to protect us - as a survival technique. Other Selves we suppress or hide as we decide these parts are not OK. Jung calls these our Shadow, because they are hidden like a shadow.

Disowning these parts makes us less than whole. We feel frustrated and powerless in certain situations. As these are out of our conscious awareness, we are at a loss how to be powerful in that area of our lives - whether it be feeling strong enough to stand up to someone at work or maybe how to be loving and spontaneous in our relationship.

An example of a Dominant Self may be called the Pleaser. If as a child you discovered the way to be safe or get love was to do something to please people, then you may have chosen to adopt this energy pattern as a dominant part of you.

If you discovered when you got angry you were punished you may decide that anger was not OK and that you would not let that part of you come forward freely again (except if it breaks out), so it is relegated to your shadow.

That part of you would then become disowned, and a powerful part of you would be hidden for years in your shadow.

This energy does not go away. It has the effect of drawing angry people in to your life (to express the anger that you are not expressing). This same effect happens with many energy patterns.

There may be many Primary Selves you have adopted and many Disowned Selves you have hidden. You may be devastated one day later in life to find you are playing the wrong role, that one of your Dominant Selves has pinched the star part!

By reclaiming and integrating your Disowned Selves, you can become more capable and confident and, more importantly, in charge of your own life.

Origin of Voice Dialogue

Voice Dialogue was created by Dr's Hal and Sidra Stone, two distinguished American psychotherapists with Jungian backgrounds. Dr Hal Stone says of the sub-personalities, "Each part is determined to run our lives. It is as if our automobiles were being driven in turn by different parts of ourselves while we sit in the back blissfully unaware that our lives are not in our own hands."

Who's running your life? When you take responsibilty for all the different parts of you and listen to the valuable information they give you, you are then able to decide how you will act. You can have an Aware Ego, the essential part of yourself that sits in the Director's chair, and is aware of the wealth of characters that make up your cast.

The jaded businessman/woman can then become the Dancer or the Lover or simply the Child Within that wants to feel safe and loved and maybe sometimes go out and have icecream.

An Article about Voice Dialogue

The following is an article published in Whole Person's Purple Pages describing one person's experience of Voice Dialogue with Mary King.

Are You On A Relationship Roller-Coaster?
by Pamela Ann Sun

After all I'd done why was I still having relationship problems?

Then ... Eureka! I discovered Voice Dialogue!

Jung said we are made of sub-personalities. We learn which personalities are acceptable and which aren't.

In my family anger was acceptable, fun wasn't. I 'disowned' my FUN part!

We attract people who carry the energies we have disowned. A person who has 'no anger' may have angry people around. I attracted men who acted 'silly'!

Mary King used Voice Dialogue to discover the cause of my relationship problems by talking directly to my different 'Selves'.

Mary sat facing me, two empty chairs on either side. She asked my Controller, the ego part that controls outward behavior, permission to speak to other 'Selves'. The Controller agreed. Mary asked for the Self that was in charge at the time. It was my Pleaser who moved to another chair feeling burdened and serious. Her voice was heavy. The Pleaser was tired and wanted a rest.

After sensitive discussion I moved to my original chair.

I felt the energy within me change. I was back to Pamela feeling lighter and surprised!

Then Mary asked to speak to the 'Child Within'. I almost skipped to the other chair and sat awkwardly. Tears came. The Child was sad and serious. She wanted to play, go to the beach, dance and eat ice-cream!

As I took my chair the energy changed again. I was learning so much about myself.

Later I met different sub-personalities - my 'Punisher' who caused my headaches, my 'Wise Self' who understood my purpose, and my 'Inner Critic' who constantly criticized me.

I learned to balance the energies and take charge.

Shakti Gawain, author of Creative Visualization and Living in the Light, says, "Voice Dialogue is a tool to heal the planet."

Counselling for Couples

Dear Mary … thank you very much for the 'Voice Dialogue session' we had with you.  As a couple it made quite an impact on us, especially looking at the various roles that are played out in relationship (all relationships!) - and how that affects decision-making processes.  We've made a couple of important changes since we worked with you and life is humming along nicely. It's especially great to note how you worked with us; taking into account that we're people who have already done a lot of 'personal development' ... we're very aware there's always something else to learn about how to relate with another person - even if you know them really well. You're a great facilitator - we're lucky to have you in our life as a friend and mentor.
Kind regards
Mark & Eileen
Auckland, New Zealand

Body Dialogue

Even though we may not realize it, our thoughts are creative.

What we think and feel is registered in our bodies. Our cells hold the memories of everything that happens in our lives. Sometimes the energy gets blocked and this barrier is stored in the body. If it is not released it can be the cause of an illness. Our Inner Selves, Voices or sub-personalities are in charge of the situation and we may not realize we can do something about it.

Our emotions, our thoughts and our spirit all manifest in our physical world. If you have pain or disease in your body, struggle in your relationships or financial challenges these can all be linked back to your emotional, mental or spiritual bodies.

In a Voice Dialogue session Mary King uses her experience and wisdom to hold the energy so that you can become aware of, experience and separate from the part of you that is causing your challenges. Voice Dialogue allows you to see and experience non-judgmentally what is happening for you. You then have the Power To Choose consciously for your self. It is your choice! You can consciously choose to change a pattern (or not) as you see fit.

Voice Dialogue is a very powerful tool for developing awareness of what makes us tick as human beings, psychologically and physically. Osteoarthritis in my right knee caused me considerable pain over many years. Using Voice Dialogue with Mary King I became aware of the energy of a desperate and frightened child being carried in that knee! I consciously embraced the energy with an aware ego. The relief in my knee was immediate and dramatic. It has been 80% better since. I still need to care for the knee at a physical level, but it is now relieved of the burden of expressing an energy I had disowned.
Ian (67 years)

Read more Testimonials about Mary's work.

Mary King is available for one on one sessions or phone appointments. Call (03) 9882 1886 now.

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